Talking about my pins!: wedding board

I love my wedding board and apparently so do a lot of other people! I have a ton of people I don’t know following just my wedding board. And this necklace is one of my most repinned pins!

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Isn’t that gorgeous!!!
You can find it here
Once I have some fund for my wedding I will definitely be purchasing this from her etsy store….the best part is it’s only 29$!! And it looks so expensive. But this pin is up to 305 pins and I usually have between 3-5 people repin this everyday. Such a great add to my board.
Since we are on the topic of neckaces here is a pictures to help match the perfect necklace with the neckline of your top or dress πŸ™‚

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Love all of these and I find them very helpful!
Hope this inspires someone πŸ˜™

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My son saved my life.

I just want to say that this will be about my faith in God and you don’t like to read about that or it offends you then please keep scrolling

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This is my first born son and I. He is truly a gift from god.
I suffer from severe chronic depression and have only in the past year tried medicine to help it. I loved in denial about it for a very very long time. I believe it’s genetic because my mother had it. The point is I cannot handle extreme situations. Especially if it involves death. My mother had a lot of health issues starting with a brain tumor that she survived and a serious infection that put her in ICU. She survived all of this to die from a fall in her house. Whenever she was sick with the tumor I was young and didn’t understand the whole situation. He kept her here for me. She had the infection and I was pregnant with my son I prayed and I prayed to let her see him born. He kept her here for me. It was the February of my senior year and it was a few months before my son turned 1. He took her from me. I was angry I gave up my faith I didn’t understand why. But now I look at him and I thank god that I had him to take care of otherwise I think I would have taken my own life I was so sad for such a very long long time and I envisioned how much easier it would be just to give up. But I would look at his face and think of how I feel now without my mom and I would be doing that to him. I would make him mad and angry and make him give up on his faith he might have a chance to have. It’s been two years since my mother died and my son is now three and I truly couldn’t imagine having a better little boy. He is truly the sweetest little boy and I am so thankful that he is mine and I’m so thankful God gave me something to hold on to while he took my mother from her pain.
I still deal my depression but at least I know what it is and what I can do to help it get better because my pride and joy deserves everything in this world.

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Talking about my pins!: lipstick

So I was recently asked by my sister in law to help her learn to do make up. Since I’ve been doing my own make up since like the 7th grade all by myself with no help I have learned a lot. Pretty much by trial and error.. Mostly errors.. A lot of errors… I can’t even look at my yearbooks until like 10th grade. Ugh
Anyway I taught her some basics and soon I am going to go and get a huge hall of makeup. Huge like 300$ because I truly have nothing for make up even though I LOVE IT! I love make up and I really only have the basics now because when your a mom a stay at home mom non the less you don’t really have the funds nor the time to do your makeup. But ladies I do encourage to do what makes you feel the prettiest! And if that’s wearing makeup for your 3 year old then so be it! πŸ˜‰
But anyway I love love love lipstick love it I love the colors I love how it feels everything but the only thing I do hate about it is that in 10 minutes my lipstick is gone. I’ve been on this mission to find a lipstainlipstickgloss stuff. I had discovered it when a coworker showed me her stain gloss stuff and rubbed her hand across the color and NOTHING was on her hand! I was on a search to find it but haven’t. Until now!!! 20140622-221443-80083498.jpg
Of course it’s elf lol
I don’t know if this is the brand she had but it looks just like it almost exactly. I have tried the other elf lip stain that looks kind of like a colored sharpie but that one was no good hopefully when I buy this new elf product I will have more luck.
The only thing is I have other lipsticks I want to last all day! So how do I do this? Well I found this pin on Pinterest 20140622-221827-80307953.jpg
It says if you do these steps your lipstick will last longer but I haven’t tried it yet hopefully this will work for those.
Well I also have a splurge I want to get because I have seen it used on a YouTube make up tutorial and it was amazing! Completely no color fade I was really pigmented and there was absolutely nothing that rubbed off

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Now this is really a splurge because it’s 22$ on Amazon and it isn’t on drugstore.com so this would be one time special order just to try it and have it for special occasions maybe like the wedding πŸ˜‰πŸ‘°
But seriously want to get these two products and compare and also try those steps above for my already bought lipsticks I love!
All of these pins are on my Pinterest page under the board “my style” you have to dig a tiny bit because I have a lot of hair stuff on there because I recently chopped off all my hair!

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In the bottom left I have one of my fav lipsticks on which is I think maybelline 24 hour? I know it’s something 24 hour lol love it!
Hope this inspires someone! πŸ˜™

My biggest struggle

So this post will be about me, man I like to talk about myself, but I’m really hoping it might help someone out there.

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So since I started grade school I was teased and bullied because of how I looked. I have been so insecure throughout my whole life because I felt that everyone was judging me. It didn’t help I had my dad breathing down my neck to be a stick or my whole family judging and talking about me behind my back. I felt so ugly and so fat. I constantly compared myself to other women (even though I was a young girl) trying desperately to be thin going to extreme measures of not eating for days. Binge eating and trying to throw it all up again. I would wear low cut shirts to get the boys attention. I learned how to do make up. I would wear make up and straighten my hair every single day even on the weekends. All I did was dress up. I never had Tshirt and sweatpants days. All I would do was look in the mirror and tell myself I was fat and ugly. Looking back now I was perfect I looked gorgeous and I’m sure a lot of girls envied me. Now I’m a mom and I never do my hair I never put makeup on I always have Tshirt and sweatpants days. But now I’m more depressed I look at myself and say I should have done this I should do this. Because back then I was 130 and now I’m 185. But day after day as my husband tells me I’m beautiful I look in the mirror and say I’m okay with my muffin top I’m okay with my hair in a ponytail I’m okay with my stretch marks. Not saying that I don’t want to change my health habits and loose a little weight but if your not okay with what you look like now then how are you going to like what you look like later. I saw a video about a women who was very unhappy with herself do she started working out and eating right. she got to exactly where she wanted to be. She was one of those muscly girls who flex and tan and get judged and stuff. She said it still wasn’t good enough. She still wasn’t happy with herself even having the perfect body many of us would kill for. If You want to change how you look. You have to love what you look like now. I had long hair when I was young my hair is beautiful but I absolutely never do it and even if I do do it by the middle of the event we are at it’s up in a ponytail. My usual. Seriously people can recognize me from behind because of my ponytail. Horrible😰. But for some reason I always look at pictures of women who have long gorgeous hair and how they style it and I plan on all these things but never do them. So I’m going for that mom look and I’m chopping off my hair for something different to get away from the ponytail so I can find myself beautiful. The only person who is judging you is you. If you think blue eyeshadow makes you look amazing then wear. wear what you feel looks best because no one who is judging is going to matter but you. Make yourself happy in every way. Love yourself for your wrinkles and your big thighs. Love yourself because you made it to fifty. Love your grey hair. Love your own beauty because you are real and the super models in the magazines are photoshopped. Be your kind of beautiful. Love yourself today so you can change and still be happy because it’s you.
Hope this inspires someone! 😘❀️

Talking about my pins!: Sauces

Oh my! It seems like I haven’t been on here in forever! Been busy bees with my boys. It’s hard in our small town to get out and do things especially in the Texas heat! If we want to go to the park we have to get up early before it gets to hot or we make a play date with their cousins or we go to the college pool. Trying to keep these toddlers happy is definitely not easy!

But today I want to talk about sauces. Sauces can change your ordinary boring dinner into something completely different. Around here I make a lot of grilled chicken with veggies I try to change up the seasonings but it wasn’t cutting it for them. Picky picky. Well I found these little packets of sauce in the freezer section of my local Walmart and I opted for the mushroom sauce oppose to the basil pesto because the hubby loves mushrooms :). But this frozen sauce packet is like little ice cubes portioned in four sections so if you just live with a roommate or husband you can just use two and save the other two for later. I loved that part of it but we love sauce so we used all of it lol. It was a total success everyone ate happily not even noticing it was the third time that week for grilled chicken and veggies! Totally recommend sauces. Today we will be having oven baked fajitas and I will be making a really simple cilantro sauce to go with it. It’s kind of like a pesto but Tex-mex version πŸ™‚ πŸ‘‡
cilantro sauce
I actually don’t have a food processor which is unfortunate but I do have a blender and I hope it works ok!
For more sauce recipes visit my dinner page on Pinterest!

Meal planning! My shopping trip!

So I’m done shopping y’all!
Now I’m going to admit my faults and praise my rights!Lol
Let’s do faults first.
One I bought stuff not on my list but in my defense I had good coupons and these things we semi needed items.
Two I brought one of my kiddos along
Three I kinda went over board on the crystal light…
So when I took my kiddos to the doc for their check ups they weighed my three year old and told me he weighed 52 pounds and was 3ft 3in tall.. That’s a BIG three year old. He is in the 75 percentile for his height but unfortunately his weight has sky rocketed off the chart.. Why am I telling you this? Because my child does nothing but drink juice all day long when he was at day care he would only get milk at lunch and water the rest of the day but he knows we have it here and refuses water now 😦 so because juice has a ton of calories and sugar I decided to not buy juice and get the crystal light mixes and the squirt mix stuff. This has less calories and he still has the water. I went over board on crystal light because as I said last blog post my Kroger was doing the buy five save five and almost all the crystal light was part of that. I got each thing of crystal light for 1.68$! Awesome deal so I bought a bunch.. Like every flavor… Probably won’t have to buy some until the middle of next month. That took a good chunk from my budget that I wasn’t planning on spending for it but at least I didn’t spend a ton on juice and that!
Let’s move on the the praise!
I did so well on my meat! They didn’t have a ton of sales for meat but they had several items on manager special!
I got ground chicken for .79 cents a pound! I only got two because we really don’t use ground chicken but I figured I would come up with something. I got pork chops sets of four for 2.00$ each! Almost every item of meat I got was manager special. They also had the pack of ten burgers for ten dollars. I also got a big bag of chicken leg quarters for 6.69. I did very well and got a lot. My was empty freezer is now packed to the brim! Along with the five for five deal I had corresponding coupons and got some juice for me and the hubby. It was the trop50 and the tropicana farm stand I got for a 1.50 each! For my whole trip I saved around 65$! Woohoo!
I think we should be able to last all month at least I hope so!

So me again…

This post will be about me but if you follow me you know I finally went on my big shopping trip today and things went great but I had such a big list that I will have to go back tomorrow and once I finish I will write all about it πŸ™‚
Anyway so I’m suppose to come into some money finally which we will have to pay back later but it’s hard being broke and if you don’t have to pay it back until way later then why not live a little? Idk how I feel about this but there is a lot of things we need… Ugh but anyway I have made a wish list for myself because I really need clothes I can’t fit anything anymore and everything I did fit for some reason has been lost.. I think I had my clothes in a trash bag when we moved and it took us forever to get unpacked so we started just throwing things away and I’m pretty sure my clothes were a part of that… I think it was a bag I thought was old baby clothes but I found that bag so anyway. I have nothing to wear and what I do wear does not fit not even my t shirts fit anymore. This is so frustrating I can’t even be comfortable anymore. I’ve gain quite a bit of weight since the kids which is no excuse but I planned on loosing weight obviously this would take a while. But should I really be buying practically a whole new wardrobe if I am trying to loose weight.. I don’t think I’ll ever get to where I want to be but hopefully in a medium but I have to buy x large now… How can you even try to loose weight when your shirt comes up and exposes your belly to everyone while you work out or all your shorts all so short you look like a hooker on the corner.. Also all my clothes are from early High school (my parents stopped buying clothes for me when I got pregnant) I don’t feel like a grown woman when I wear most of my things But it’s also hard to even go in public because I worry how I look.. I think I will buy the clothes and hopefully I will slowly loose weight and can buy or alter things later..